2 Easiest Self-Regulation Tools for Adults and Children
In the course of our lives, we are frequently faced with situations that take us off balance and require mental and emotional resilience.
Once a feeling of anxiety or fear hits, we unconsciously tend to frantically look for soothing ways outside of us. But wait, why not develop a habit of using the quickest, easiest and healthiest way to self-regulate our uncomfortable emotions - our breath?
In an ideal world, we would have been taught to self-regulate our emotions since childhood. Wouldn't that have a far-reaching consequence in the form of calmer and more confident teenagers and adults as well as a safer environment within the family and outside of it? Here you will find the two easiest ways to calm yourself down using your breath. Also adapted for children in the form of a game.
4-7-8 or Yellow Submarine
This breathing technique is my favorite one. I use it very often - from calming my thoughts before another public presentation to the times when I struggle to fall asleep.
This easy tool has been adapted from the pranayama breath in the Vedic yoga tradition and helps switch our physiology into a "rest and digest" state where it feels safe.
breathe in through the nose while counting up to 4
hold the breath while counting up to 7
breathe out very slowly through pursed lips while counting up to 8
Repeat as many times as you need. Ten times usually works for me.
In order to teach a kid this easy technique, it can be combined with the game and called, for example, "A yellow submarine":
we imagine that we are about to go and explore who lives in the ocean, we step into the yellow submarine and get prepared
we breathe in for a count of 4, while the submarine goes under the water
we hold our breath while we look around and imagine who we can see under the water (e.g. a starfish, a turtle, an octopus, a whale, etc.)
we slowly breathe out on the count of 8 as we ascend from the water
For a child, it can be a game, an adventure, and a calming exercise all in one go. And the more you practice it, the stronger habit can be built to use it when Mom is not around. Of course, it depends on the age of a child and an explanation that this game helps to calm down any fears or insecurities.
4-8 Straw Breathing or a Magic Flute
In a similar way as the exercise above, this technique helps to activate the parasympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system (which happens every time our out-breath is longer than our in-breath).
breathe in through a nose for a count of 4
breathe out slowly and with an effort and with pursed lips for a count of 8
if you have a straw, you can use it
For a child, it can again be adapted in the form of a game - with a real, or an imaginary straw imagining that it is a Magic Flute. You can always invent "the rules" of the game to make sure that a child is engaged and can do at least a few rounds of this exercise.
Self-regulation is something that every single person on this planet could benefit from. It's really not a luxury, it's a necessity to live this life with inner resilience and smart tools to make sure we can withstand any emotions that are coming our way.
If you are interested to learn more about Evolutionary Astrology and Somatic Intelligence, check out my "Soul Growth" Program description and feedback from the participants. I would be delighted to greet you there.
With loving kindness,
Jev